Mindblown: a blog about philosophy.
Honest reflections on Unhealthy relationships: Affirm me when I need to affirm myself.
If a person in my life has a constant need for affirmation, it may be that they have never learned to think through what they are asking for. Can you help me with my homework? Its the dreaded dad question. Probably not because i haven’t done algebra since 10th grade. Probably not because I don’t […]
Honest reflections on Unhealthy Relationships part 2: complaints
We can often find outselves hiding our needs in a complaint. We haven’t had a date in a week. You never listen to my ideas. You never take initiative. All these can easily be reframed as a simple request to have your needs legitemately met. Could we go out on a date tonight? Can we […]
Honest reflections on unhealthy relationships
We all have them. Unhealthy patterns in otherwise healthy relationships. I believe in counseling. So I practice what i preach and talk to my therapist often. And sometimes I get real gold. Typical me, I want to share it. So here’s today’s therapy gold. If you push me away, that’s where I’m at. Sometimes people […]
Friends, Money and Social Class
How to be friends with people from different social classes. I spent a number of years in Africa. The richness of my time there is in the relationships I formed. But one tension was always money. Who had it, who didn’t, and how it was leveraged. In my context in the US, I am thoroughly […]
There is no weather, there is only walking the dog.
I live in the Northland. I have a dog. Fortunately, she’s lazy. One walk a day and she pretty much sits by the fire and loves life. But for a time each day, she needs to get out an move. So we walk. The weather is irrelevant to the need. When I live life this […]
Life Lessons: 49 Life Lessons. Lifecartography, 9 years later.
49 Life lessons learned by age 49. As I approached 40 years old, I decided to sit down and write. I wanted to write things I had learned, so that I wouldn’t forget them. Well, research says that you don’t forget as much as your library gets bigger. But that’s beside the point. So those […]
My panic attack and Simon Biles Olympic dreams.
Simon Biles is an amazing woman. She is powerful, charismatic, but still only human after all. After she pulled out of the event in the Olympics, much digital ink has been spilled. I grieve for her. Last year, I had a car accident. A driver ran through a stop sign, came across to the far […]
Never Split the Difference- For professional coaches.
Coaching questions drawn from Chris Voss Never Split the difference How cool is a former FBI hostage negotiator? I don’t remember how to ran across this book, but it has become a re-read yearly (actually, I re-listen yearly). As a former FBI kidnapping negotiator, Chris Voss’s book “Never Split the Difference” is a great resource […]
Immoral AI, Ultron and the American presidential election.
As I sat and watched my home country turn upon itself in the last few months, my heart and my head have been, like many of you, asking “how could this happen?” Many pundits have pointed digital fingers. Bad actors, fake news, real news called fake news, foreign influences, the list is long and varied. […]
Why I turned off comments on my blog
I hadn’t blogged in a few weeks, when I had an idea and opened my WordPress interface to post my new thoughts. Low and behold, a whole slew of new comments were waiting for approval. Excitement surged until I saw that most of them were from one person. They all started fairly amicably enough, the […]
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