Category Archives: Social Media

Three Vintage Skills Millenials can develop to stand out!

3 Skills Millennials can learn to distinguish themselves in the marketplace

“Call him.”

“I sent him a message.”

“That’s not good enough. Give him a call.” One of my clients, a young millennial man, just didn’t see the need to make the phone call. The text should be enough, shouldn’t it?

Today, when someone says “call me,” why do we assume that means something bad?

Millennials are, or will be shortly, the largest sector in the workforce. Those who want to distinguish themselves can work on these three “vintage” skills. Because for the next 20 years, most of your bosses will be X and Boomers. Because being a millennials, with all the accompanying awesomeness and potential challenges, will now be the norm. And those who succeed in entrepreneurship will be hiring Xers and Boomers as well.

3 Vintage skills to distinguish yourself in the marketplace.

  1. Phone calls.

Sure, everyone likes a text message. Easy, quick and painless. No getting stuck in the awkward, “hello, goodbye, how are things…” Except this may be the very key to standing out in a crowded field.

As a coach who works with young people, I am amazed how hard a follow up phone call is for them. And I’m gratified by the almost universal positive response when people actually call.

  1. Face to Face meetings

While phone calls are great, tone, nuance and persona are hard to guage at a distance. While millenials are extremely relational, or social, the face to face meeting has some protocols as well.

  1. FOCUS

In a world where social media rules, and our phones are now a digital extention of ourselves, the millennial who would distinguish themselves must know how to focus. Singular focus does not come from scrolling, swiping, liking and sharing. These are all wonderful, fun and informative.

Focus will be a key differentiator. As my clients know, shutting down all screens for a period of time leads to emotional consternation but then an amazing bump in productivity occurs as the mind is freed from constant distractions and latches on to the topic at hand.

Let me know what you think on our Facebook page.

Graphic courtesy of freepik




43 Life Lessons from Bible characters.

Birthday’s are times for reflection for me. I want to continue to learn. Here’s 43 things I learned from Bible characters.

1. Joseph: Forgive by don’t forget. Reconciliation should only come when change has happened.
2. Jesus: Presence is the greatest gift you can give.
3. Jacob: Running from your problems only delays the inevitable confrontation
4. Adam. Sometimes you have to disagree with the whole world, even if that’s just your wife.
5. Cain: You are your brother’s keeper.
6. Noah: Legacy has impact on your children’s destiny. Noah-Ham-Canaan.
7. Abraham: Beware the patterns you establish. They will continue for generations. Both Good and Bad. (Altars and Favorite children)
8. Isaac. Keep investing in your life. Your future depends on it.
9. Joseph: Your dreams are usually about yourself. Big dreams are about others.
10. Sampson: Never flirt with evil.
11. Moses: you’re never too old to start something new.
12. Moses: God won’t allow lame excuses to keep us from his destiny for us.
13. Joshua: To be a great man, you must first be around great men. Walk where they walked, talk with who they talk. Live as they live
14. Caleb: You’re never too old to fight for what’s yours. But the older you get, the more you need those younger than you.
15. Ruth: A life of service to others is never a bad choice.
16. Naomi: Take care of those who take care of you. Set them up for success and you’ll be blessed too.
17. Deborah: Never let your position in society determine how well you serve.
18. Samuel: You can learn from corrupt old people.
19. Samuel: You are never too young to start speaking the things God shows you.
20. Saul: Sometimes the thing you didn’t want becomes the thing you hold on to the most. Everything we have is from God, hold it lightly.
21. David: Weep like a broken-hearted father, but lead even when you are in pain.
22. David: Never stop going to war. Ever. Or you’ll end up on a rooftop, not knowing you are destroying your family.
23. Solomon: God loves you. Regardless of your family history.
24. Solomon: Knowing right and doing right are two different things.
25. Jeroboam: Listen to older people. Your friends are usually idiots.
26. Manasseh: You’re never too old to turn it around.
27. Josiah: Don’t get cocky. Accept the space God has given you
28. Josiah: Don’t get into other people’s fights.
29. Isaiah: Never be too proud to obey God. History will look on you as a man of integrity even if you walk around naked for three years.
30. Solomon: just because you say it and its written down doesn’t make it true. (“All is meaningless”)
31. Andrew: if the only thing you ever do is bring people to Jesus, that’s enough.
32. James: Serving your family isn’t a bad thing.
33. Jesus: Even Jesus was obedient to parents who were sinners.
34. Paul: getting knocked on your butt is sometimes the best thing that can happen to you.
35. The high priest: truth can come even from angry, or evil sources (prophesy of one dying to save Israel).
36. Pilate: listen to your wife.
37. Jeremiah: If you whine, people will remember you as a whiner.
38. David: if you want people to remember what you say, write a song. If you want people to remember what you do, kill giants.
39. Joseph: your greatest legacy may be how you care for what is someone else’s.
40. Anananias: your greatest moment may come when you have to overcome your greatest fear
41. Timothy: You may not understand why and may have to trust someone else that they have your best at heart. (Being circumcised as an adult). Trust the right people.
42. John: you may think you are being clear, but if people don’t understand your metaphors, you’ll create confusion. (Book of Revelation)
43. Anna: Waiting is hard but worth it. Worship while you wait.

Why it doesn’t matter if Bryan Huston and T.D. Jakes do or don’t support gay marriage.

The blogsphere is alive and well friends. Full of decent journalism, no. But alive and well, yes.

Christians have eagerly shared articles claiming to show Hillsongs’s supposed endorsement of homosexual lifestyle at their New York campus. Opps, turns out that it’s not quite the whole story. But those links are still up there, alive and perpetuating the distortion.

T.D. Jakes is unclear in an interview, then clarifies a couple days later. Both articles light up the blogsphere. Social media is abuzz.

With gossip.

True or false, this is gossip.

The blogsphere is alive and well friends. Full of decent journalism, no. But alive and well yes.

There is a fascinating scene at the end of the Epistle of John, just after Jesus restores Peter.  Having a glimpse of his future, Peter does what we all do. He looks back and sees John, the beloved. Jesus’ favorite.

“What about him, Lord?” John 21:21

Jesus response is telling for our times.

“What does it matter? You, Follow me.”

Perhaps is Christendom at large, and the evangelical world concerned about the collapse of a Christian value system in the United States, should consider this message as timely.

“You, follow me.”

Leave Joel Olsteen out of it. And Justin Beiber’s pastor. And Bryan Huston and T.D. Jakes.

Perhaps the words of Gamaliel to the Sanhedrin should ring in our hearts today. [Find the story in Acts 5:34-40]

“If this man is not from God, he will fail. But if he is, we should not oppose him.”(paraphrase)

You, follow me.

Do we know so little of the great things God is doing that we must spend our time reposting stories of the failures (or supposed failures) of others?

Trust me, our friends who are not followers of Jesus are not worried about Christian mega-names supporting or not supporting a Liberal agenda. They don’t know, they don’t care. They’ve never heard of Rick Warren, or Mark Driscoll, or any number of the names the Blogsphere loves to crucify. Who cares!!!!!

You, follow me.

Proclaim truth. Not whether you follow Peter, or Paul or… wait, that rings a familiar bell that was rung in Corinth. Ah, how we love to travel familiar territory.

You, follow me.

What so ever things are excellent, noble, praiseworthy, think about these things.


Do we know so little of the great things God is doing that we must spend our time reposting stories of the failures (or supposed failures) of others?

You, follow me.

Don’t lean in a group photo. Just don’t.

Ok, so I saw another picture that just drove me nuts, and I’ve gotta get this off my chest.

Don’t lean into that group picture.

Don’t lean your head.

Don’t bend your body in a strange shape.

Just don’t. You look weird.

Turn your body. Turn your head. get closer. The photographer can back up.

But for goodness sakes, stop leaning into group photos.

I’ve done it. I look goofy. If you do it, you’ll look goofy too. Stop it. Now. Seriously. don’t.

Rant over.


The Ice Bucket Challenge, Part 2: What it feels like to die.

Since my first article, the Ice Bucket Challenge has continued unabated. Sure, there are the concerns voiced by the Catholics and the Baptists. Concerns that I echo. Two wrongs don’t make a right, and if someone is going to die for someone else, it should be their choice.

But I want to return to THE POINT.

My first article was about people with ALS for once feeling like people care. But there is one extra “bit” that we are missing.

My friend Neal and his brother posted this poignant video. You see, they lost their brother a little over a year ago to ALS. The point that so many people are missing about the Ice Bucket Challenge is the ice. The sudden shock to your system that causes that momentary feeling of breathlessness. Of suffocating. Continue reading The Ice Bucket Challenge, Part 2: What it feels like to die.

3 questions to ask after a potential donor says “no.”

My dad’s life growing up was one I didn’t want. At least not the part where we lived in the US. As missionaries with the AG, our system requires us to come home every 4 years to replenish our support.


Here’s how the system works. You get a list of churches in your district. You start calling. You talk mainly to answering machines and church secretaries. You knock and knock and knock. Eventually you get invited to come speak. About a third of those will add you to their support list. Dad spent most of his time doing this when living in the US. For some years, so did I.

The problem is that the system is very inefficient and the Return on Investment is low, because so many calls are wasted. They don’t have to be though. Here are 3 things that you can do after you are told “no” by a potential donor.

  1. Ask for their permission to add them to your email list.

Building a support base is about building relationships. Over time, your emails will make you more known.  Ask the person taking the call for the church’s main email, the contact for the missions committee, or the staff member in charge of missions. If you’ve spoken to the pastor, ask to add them to your list. (You have an email list right?)

2. Ask where the pastor can most likely be found online.

Is pastor a Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram guy? Does he blog? Most pastors will respond to a friend request. Then start building a friendship online with him, staff and the church. If you’ve talked to the pastor and gotten a “no”, still ask about their online presence.

3. Ask for a prayer request.

Pray for the secretary, or the receptionist, or whomever you talk to. When you call back, make sure you ask about that prayer request and how it went.  Praying for, rather than asking of, will change your heart as well as connect you with this church. Remember, you are first and foremost in ministry. Minister to those you can minister to, whether they can help you or not.

So what are other ways you’ve used to continue the conversation after you’ve gotten the “no” from pastors?

What’s really wrong with modern worship.

Recently, a number of articles have gone around, speaking of the decline of “worship” and the loss of so much congregational singing. link link

I think I’ve got a reputation. Not sure, but I’d bet that lots of people think that I’m anti-worship.
They are right.

If by anti-worship, you mean singing, that is. Singing, I’m all for it. You mean prayers put to music. If you mean songs that honor and glorify God through the medium of music and verbal confessions of humans on all ends of the spectrum when it comes to pitch IQ. I’m all for it.

Growing up in a small church, my mom sang and led beautifully. But on the occasions when a certain wanna-be opera singer showed up, “worship” was more like torture. Pain.

Words have meaning. We learned that from Bill Clinton, and the Mormon church. It’s possible to use the same words, and they not have the same meaning. I’ve met men whose names were actually horrible swear words in English. But the sound that comes out of their mouth actually has a different meaning in their language. No one is a “Christian” anymore. We’re “Followers of Christ” because the word has lost the original meaning, so in an effort to recapture communication, we had to start over.

Our church, the Ocean, has wonderful women and men who lead us in singing prayers and praise to God on a weekly basis. They lead us in new songs, to places we haven’t been before. But it’s not biblically worship. When they show up at practice, when they carry musical instruments, miss sleep, spend time seeking God and praying for us to encounter God during out time of singing, they are worshipping.
We are committed to the Bible as our source for belief and conduct. (Non Negotiable #2) Interesting.

Lets look in the Old Testament for the word worship. One of the closest you can come is sheddah.
“In our modern western culture worship is an action directed toward God and God alone. But this is not the case in the Hebrew Bible. The word shehhah is a common Hebrew word meaning to prostrate oneself before another in respect. We see Moses doing this to his father in law in Exodus 18:7. When the translators translate the word shehhah they will use the word “worship” when the bowing down is directed toward God but as “obeisance” or other equivalent word when directed toward another man. There is no Hebrew word meaning worship in the sense that we are used to using it in our culture today. From an Hebraic perspective worship, or shehhah is the act of getting down on ones knees and placing the face down on the ground before another worthy of respect.” (

Worship is prostration, obedience and an act of humility. Don’t believe me? Read this guy, he’s smarter than me, he’ll give you the Greek and the Hebrew.

Worship, in the bible, is either servanthood, giving, or sacrifice. Never singing.
So should we not have professional musicians “worship leaders?” Actually, we should. David hired men to conduct music and sing in the temple. Asaph was a professional song writer. He was Chris Tomlin, Jesus Culture, and the whole music industry all rolled into one. Elisha called for a musician and when the music played, it opened up his spirit to hearing from the voice of God. Men and women gifted by God in leading in this area are worthy of every penny. The church would be a poorer place without them.

Our times of praise draw us in. God delights in the praise of his people.
So what Charles? Aren’t you arguing semantics? Does it really matter?

Yes, and here’s why. Because true worship is available to every believer, is the responsibility of every believer. Even those who don’t like to sing, or who sing horribly. The contemplative. Or even more beautiful to God, the man or woman in the nursery every week holding babies as their act of servanthood so that others can have their spirits opened to an encounter with God. That’s worship. The man who comes and cleans the building and prays over every chair. The mother who readies her 3 kids all by herself and gets them to their class where they hear about Jesus. That’s worship. The person who faithfully gives financially and time to their local community of faith, regardless of their financial situation.
Calling yourself a band leader, music director, fine arts person doesn’t diminish you. It’s an act of rebellion that might actually be worship.

Much like everyone went from being pastor to being prophet and now the buzzword is Apostle, so too our current music movement has been driven by our desire for value. Recognition.

The true worshippers worship in spirit and in truth. It’s a heart action, not a vocalization.
Every time someone minimizes the powerful spiritual leadership you exert in our community because we don’t use the right words, you are worshippers. Every time you get criticized for the new songs, for following your pastor’s directives of nothing older than 5 years, you are worshippers. You lead us in prayer, you usher us into the presence of Jesus, where you have been yourself. To those who serve us coffee with your teams, you are worshippers. To all those who don’t get “fed” so our children can learn of Jesus, you are worshippers. Even when you aren’t singing. Especially when you aren’t.

This is a repost from my family blog.

Understanding Push Content Versus the Social Stream

Do you still need a web page? In the age of Facebook and other social media outlets, what’s the point of having a webpage? Or an email newsletter? Why bother since everyone can just find you on social media? Don’t they already follow you? Yes and No.

Understanding Push Content Versus Stream Content

In the early days of the web, say circa 1995, email was all there was. I remember trying to come up with a modular, dynamic design for websites back around the year 2000. The technology just wasn’t there for the average user.

Then came myspace. Then came Facebook. Then went myspace. But that’s a different story.

But for those who haven’t grown up native digital communicators, there is a key concept that if often overlooked. Without it, your digital communications will be seriously hampered.

Social Media is a stream. It flows constantly, and like the Matrix, “its way too much to decode.” On average, most Facebook users have 388 friends. If that’s the average, the likelihood that you have more, and maybe many more, because there is no way you are average right? But… There is no way to keep up with 388 people. Add to that the hundreds, maybe thousands of people you can quickly follow on Twitter, and pretty soon, what happens?

Well, Facebook starts to decide who it thinks you like to interact with. Some viewers are hidden by the all famous “algorithm.” Though its possible to reset the feature, they keep hiding how to do it with every new update.

Why is this all important?

Because PUSH content is content that you can actively invade users worlds. Now, push content must come with permission, otherwise its considered SPAM. But if the choice is a “Like” on a page, or a sign up for an email newsletter, take the sign up. The “Like” gets you into the persons stream. But if they aren’t frequently users, if their time schedule doesn’t connect with yours, or for any number of other reasons, your posts will not be seen. You will flow by in the stream, unnoticed.

But if you have permission based PUSH content, you will get noticed.

The best of both worlds though is BOTH. In your digital media platform, you send emails, which draw you to a website, where you invite people to share, like, and comment in the social-sphere. Neglect the social aspect and people will think all you care about is yourself. Neglect the PUSH aspect, and you may be a nice guy or gal, but you’ll never get noticed.

With the vast number of social media outlets, a website serves as home base, headquarters, whatever. Its a place that needs to exist because in the social arena, you can’t know who is where when. Or even if they saw your post. But with email (PUSH) and RSS (PUSH), you can make an effort to have people dip into your stream where you are.

Hope that makes sense.


What Jeff Gordon’s new Pepsi Max Commercial teaches about leadership

Have you seen the new Pepsi Max commercial with professional driver Jeff Gordon? If you haven’t, you probably haven’t been online the last few days. A Journalist named Travis Okulski sounded off about how the first video Gordon made was fake. His friends gave him a wake up call.  Go ahead, watch it if you haven’t.

Did you notice something? At the end of the new video, Gordon offers the big mouth journalist another ride. Okulski jumps on the opportunity.

Maybe he didn’t know that the echoes of his girly screaming would be resonating across the internet. Maybe he hadn’t seen how bad he looked on video, or how Jeff Gordon probably didn’t want brown stains on the front seat of his car.

In a brief nanosecond, the trust changed. Instead of fearing for his life, this journalist was now ready to jump back into the car with the guy that moments before he had been convinced was insane.

What changed?

Trust. Trust in competence.

The guy didn’t care that Jeff Gordon had just scared 5 years off his life. Knowing that you were in the hands of one of the best race car drivers of this generation rather than an ex-con made all the difference.

Want total strangers to trust you? Want trust from those closet to you? Develop competency. And prove it over and over.

BTW: Money well spent Pepsi Max.

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