3 things my son lost with his disability

Recently, our son began needing a wheelchair. It’s a journey thousands face.

In this process, we’ve received lots of love and support from friends and family. Yet at the end of the day, we often feel like people don’t know what to do with Joshua because of his disability. Here are three things we’ve noticed that he has lost.

Big brother is cool #brother #sistrr #life

A photo posted by Charles Porter (@lifecartographer) on


Joshua is a very social little person. He’s extremely joyful and people love to be around him. But he’s also private. He’s an 11 year old boy, who went from a certain level of independence to need help going to the toilet. I can tell he is embarrassed. He also needs help bathing. I know it’s humbling for him.


There are so many things he can no longer do for himself. Which means that he can’t be left alone. At 11, that’s probably not what he needs anyway. One of the goals of healthy parenting though is teaching our children a certain amount of independence.

How do you do that when your child can get up off the ground if they fall down?

Age Appropriate Social interaction

Before Joshua’s illness began to talk its toll, when he could still walk and get up off the ground, friends invited him over. Peers talks to him at age appropriate levels. Adults talked to him as though he were his age.

Since he was diagnosed, Joshua hasn’t grown more than a few inches. He’s small. And sitting in a wheelchair, he isn’t very big. Everyone looks down (not emotionally, but physically) on him. And they tend to treat him then as a little one. He’s not.

Joshua and I have theological talks. We talk about girls. We have age appropriate conversations. Somehow, many people can’t see past his disability.

Joshua has some of the most wonderful people in the world who love and pray for him. We have no complaints in that area. But I know that maybe other families are struggling through this as well. If you have a child with a disability, how have you dealt with this?

79 thoughts on “3 things my son lost with his disability”

  1. Dear Charles, I appreciate that you are taking time to talk frankly about the losses Joshua is experiencing and you are grappling with. I know this will be a great help to many people understand more about the challenges this brings to a child and those who love him/her.

    Thank you.
    Your sister in Christ
    Chris Resch (RN)
    Coon Rapids

  2. Hey, Porter family!

    I am so sorry to hear about Joshua further decline.
    We have other challenges, and I think one thing we have done is pre-talk to leaders that our kids end up with. That way they have a greater chance having a good start than being judged off the bat for something they can’t help. Help people understand how Joshua wants people to talk to him – stand by wheel chair or squat down for eye level. What type of signals would he give if he is overwhelmed and wants a moment of privacy. I don’t know. Wish we all where allowed to be teh people that we are.


  3. Hey There. I discovered your weblog the usage of msn. This is
    an extremely smartly written article. I’ll be sure to bookmark it and return to
    learn extra of your useful information. Thanks for the post.
    I will certainly return.

  4. What’s Taking place i’m new to this, I stumbled upon this I have found It positively helpful and it has helped me out loads.
    I am hoping to contribute & assist other customers
    like its helped me. Good job.

  5. I’m extremely impressed together with your writing skills and also with the layout in your blog.
    Is that this a paid theme or did you customize it yourself?
    Anyway stay up the nice quality writing, it is rare to
    peer a great blog like this one these days..

  6. Fantastic beat ! I would like to apprentice at the same time as you amend your web site, how can i subscribe for a blog website?
    The account helped me a applicable deal. I were a
    little bit acquainted of this your broadcast provided shiny transparent

  7. Attractive component to content. I just stumbled upon your website and in accession capital
    to assert that I acquire in fact loved account your blog posts.
    Anyway I will be subscribing in your feeds and even I fulfillment you get
    right of entry to constantly fast. quest bars http://bitly.com/3C2tkMR quest bars

  8. Unquestionably believe that which you said. Your
    favorite justification seemed to be on the web the easiest thing to be aware of.
    I say to you, I definitely get irked while people think about worries that they plainly do
    not know about. You managed to hit the nail upon the top and defined out the whole thing without having side-effects , people can take a signal.
    Will likely be back to get more. Thanks scoliosis
    surgery https://0401mm.tumblr.com/ scoliosis surgery

  9. “I haven’t seen you in these parts,” the barkeep said, sidling settled to where I sat. “Name’s Bao.” He stated it exuberantly, as if say of his exploits were shared by way of settlers about multitudinous a ‚lan in Aeternum.

    He waved to a wooden keg apart from us, and I returned his indication with a nod. He filled a field-glasses and slid it to me across the stained red wood of the court prior to continuing.

    “As a betting fellow, I’d be willing to wager a adequate bit of silver you’re in Ebonscale Reach in search more than the wet one’s whistle and sights,” he said, eyes glancing from the sword sheathed on my cool to the bow slung across my back.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.