We can often find outselves hiding our needs in a complaint.
We haven’t had a date in a week.
You never listen to my ideas.
You never take initiative.
All these can easily be reframed as a simple request to have your needs legitemately met.
Could we go out on a date tonight?
Can we try this idea I have?
Can you make this decision?
See how easy that was? Instead of framing our needs in a complaint, we ask. And the person on the other end doesn’t feel attacked. Voila. genius!